Wednesday, January 18, 2012

The Cat by A. B. Patterson

 
 
 
MOST people think that the cat is an unintelligent 
animal, fond of ease, and caring little for anything 
'but mice and milk. But a cat has really more character 
than most human beings, and gets a great deal more satisfaction 
out of life. Of all the animal kingdom, the cat has 
the most many-sided character. 

He — or she — is an athlete, a musician, an acrobat, a 
Lothario, a grim fighter, a sport of the first water. All day 
long the cat loafs about the house, takes things easy, sleeps 
by the fire, and allows himself to be pestered by the attentions 
of our womenfolk and annoyed by our children.To pass the time away 
he sometimes watches a mouse-hole for an hour or two — just to 
keep himself from dying of ennui;and people get the idea 
that this sort of thing is all that life holds for the cat. 
But watch him as the shades of evening fall, and you see 
the cat as he really is. 

When the family sits down to tea, the cat usually puts in 
an appearance to get his share, and purrs noisily, and rubs 
himself against the legs of the family; and all the time he is 
thinking of a fight or a love-affair that is coming off that 
evening. If there is a guest at table the cat is particularly 
civil to him, because the guest is likely to have the best of 
what is going. Sometimes, instead of recognizing this 
civility with something to eat, the guest stoops down and 
strokes the cat, and says, "Poor pussy! poor pussy!" 

The cat soon tires of that; he puts up his claw and quietly 
but firmly rakes the guest in the leg. 

"Ow!" says the guest, "the cat stuck his claws into me!" 
The delighted family remarks, "Isn't it sweet of him? Isn't 
he intelligent? He wants you to give him something to eat." 

The guest dares not do what he would like to do — kick 
the cat through the window — so, with tears of rage and pain 
in his eyes, he affects to be very much amused, and sorts out 
a bit of fish from his plate and hands it down. The cat 
gingerly receives it, with a look in his eyes that says: 
"Another time, my friend, you won't be so dull of comprehension," 
and purrs maliciously as he retires to a safe distance 
from the guest's boot before eating it. A cat isn't a fool — 
not by a long way. 

When the family has finished tea, and gathers round the 
fire to enjoy the hours of indigestion, the cat slouches casually 
out of the room and disappears. Life, true life, now begins 
for him. 

He saunters down his own backyard, springs to the top 
of the fence with one easy bound, drops lightly down on the 
other side, trots across the right-of-way to a vacant allotment, 
and skips to the roof of an empty shed. As he goes, he 
throws off the effeminacy of civilization; his gait becomes lithe 
and panther like; he looks quickly and keenly from side to 
side, and moves noiselessly, for he has so many enemies — 
dogs, cab men with whips, and small boys with stones. 


Arrived on the top of the shed, the cat arches his back, 
rakes his claws once or twice through the soft bark of the old 
roof, wheels round and stretches himself a few times; just 
to see that every muscle is in full working order; then, drop- 
ping his head nearly to his paws, he sends across a league of 
backyards his call to his kindred — a call to love, or war, or 
sport. 

Before long they come, gliding, graceful shadows, 
approaching circuitously, and halting occasionally to recon- 
noitre — tortoiseshell, tabby, and black, all domestic cats, but 
all transformed for the nonce into their natural state. No 
longer are they the hypocritical, meek creatures who an hour 
ago were cadging for fish and milk. They are now ruffling, 
swaggering blades with a Gascon sense of dignity. Their 
fights are grim and determined, and a cat will be clawed to 
ribbons before he will yield. 

Even young lady cats have this Inestimable superiority 
over human beings, that they can work off jealousy, hatred, 
and malice in a sprawling, yelling combat on a flat 
roof. All cats fight, and all keep themselves more 
or less in training while they are young. Your cat may be 
the acknowledged lightweight champion of his district — a 
Griffon of the feline ring ! 

Just think how much more he gets out of his life than 
you do out of yours — what a hurricane of fighting and love- 
making his life is — and blush for yourself. You have had 
and never had a good, all-out fight in your life ! 

And the sport they have, too! As they get older and 
retire from the ring they go in for sport more systematically ; 
the suburban backyards, that are to us but dullness indescribable, 
are to them hunting-grounds and trysting-places 
where they may have more gallant adventure than ever 
had King Arthur's knights or Robin Hood's merry men. 

Grimalkin decides to kill a canary in a neighboring 
verandah. Consider the fascination of it — the stealthy 
reconnaissance from the top of the fence; the care to avoid 
waking the house-dog. the noiseless approach and the hurried 
dash, and the fierce clawing at the fluttering bird till its 
mangled body is dragged through the bars of the cage; the 
exultant retreat with the spoil; the growling over the feast 
that follows. Not the least entertaining part of it is the 
demure satisfaction of arriving home in time for breakfast 
and hearing the house-mistress say: "Tom must be sick; he 
seems to have no appetite." 

It Is always leveled as a reproach against cats that they 
are more fond of their home than of the people in it. 
Naturally, the cat doesn't like to leave his country, the land 
where all his friends are, and where he knows every landmark.
Exiled in a strange land, he would have to learn a new 
geography, to exploit another tribe of dogs, to fight and make 
love to an entirely new nation of cats. Life isn't long enough 
for that sort of thing. So, when the family moves, the cat,
If allowed, will stay at the old house and attach himself to 
the new tenants. He will give them the privilege of boarding him 
while he enjoys life in his own way. He is not going 
to sacrifice his whole career for the doubtful reward which 
fidelity to his old master or mistress might bring.